share a coke with your own crippling sense of loneliness and inability to be mentally present in the real world
I decided to give Sebastian a makeover…
me: hey i’m kinda good at this writing thing
*reads other people’s writing*
me: i am a literary potato
me: *doesn’t start hw until 10 pm*
me: *at 10:15 pm* i am dROWNing in sCHOOL work why do teachers do this to me I hATE THis cruel WORLD look at all of THE iNJUSTICE
A man just walked past me and said “excuse me, but you look very nice tonight darlin” I said thank you and he said you’re welcome and walked off. And that is how you compliment a woman without harassing them
No, that is still unsolicited, and thus, harassment. No amount of “darlins” is gonna make me not want to punch your ass for coming on to me without provocation.
UR SO STUPID
It’s 2089. all cops have been replaced by genetically modified dogs that let children pet them, help old ladies cross the street, chase down criminals, never eat donuts, bark at cat-callers, analyze dna, easily track down murders, pee on white collar criminals, and tear the faces off of rapists. utopia has been reached.
How was this accomplished you ask?
Well its simple
Dogs are colorblind
He was a skater goat, he said see you later, goat.
HE WASN’T GOAT ENOUGH FOR HERD